Memorial Day Weekend

A few things about Memorial Day. . .

We had a great long weekend spent with family and grilling and pools and a sprinkler and dogs and hot hot weather.

I feel weirdly conflicted about the holiday. I made Kiernan a little American flag to wave and we talked about all his family members (well the ones that he knows well) who have served in the armed forces. I am generally proud of what Memorial Day represents, I value the commemorative pride that communities take in their members who have given over their lives to civil service. I love to see the old veterans getting together with each other. I love to see the way they reconnect with those formative moments in their lives and with other people who really get it. I love to see the Boy Scouts admire the uniforms and the discipline of the soldiers. I love the solemnity that sacrifice is met with by everyone who sees it.

I was never in the military. I thought very seriously about joining the Navy but wound up in school and in my life but not for sense of repugnance toward military service. This is a little odd because both my mom and my dad were in the army and were miserable there. They had Vietnam and Nixon and all sorts of personal reasons for not wanting to be there. I heard from them all sorts of bad and completely true and valid reasons for not wanting to be in the army. My grandfather and Davids father served in Korea and have entirely positive things to say about the Army. I have lots of cousin in service right now. One just back from Iraq one currently in Afghanistan and another here in the USA. I love them and I am proud of them. It is easy for me to say to Kiernan "look at the soldiers aren't they great?".

At the same time.

I know what Gitmo means and I fear so much for what my country can be and for how our military can be used or even can go off its rocker. I know about Abu Ghraib I know that My Lai could happen again. I wish that my feelings of pride could be undiluted by that knowledge. I wish that I didn't feel unease at presenting to my boy a shining picture of the military.

The world is complex and both wonderful and horrible and for now it is enough to focus of the community aspects that are noble and I hope that when we get to the point of having a more layered discussion it goes well.